Hello, thar. Meinos Kaen here!
So, seeing the success of my first community service - otherwise known as a review of Yellow Prince's fic True Monster - and being a sucker for things that please my fans, I've decided to bring you another of my personal favorites -a recent one-, scrutinized and analyzed. This time, we have a true winner. It's a little fic that has caught my heart and didn't let go. A X-Over of just two chapters, for now, inbetween the Naruto and, as some of you probably understood from the title already, the fifth game in the Elder Scrolls series, Skyrim. Today I bring you my review of FUS ROH Dattebayo! by Huoyingmi.
The story's details are as follows. It's a very young story, of course. The game itself has only been out a few months but I don't see the hype about it dieing anytime soon. Yeah, it's that good. But that's another story for another time.
FUS ROH Dattebayo!Rated T, English, Genre: Adventure/Humor, Chapters: 2, In progress, Published the 2-10-12, Last updated the 2-21-12
Naruto! Naruto! By his honor is sworn! To keep, evil, forever at bay! And Akatsuki will route! When they hear triumph's shout! Naruto, for your, blessings we pray!
I went in half-curious, lured in by the summary which is a parody of the Song of the Dovakihnn from the game, being the first time I approached a Naruto X-Over with the Elder Scrolls. I had never read other stories from this author, the summaries of his previous two not inspiring much trust but seeing what I found in this, I will rectify that. I was pleasantly surprised. I chuckled, I laughed, I alerted, I reveled in good writing, and right here, I give this story a marvelous 9 out of 10!
Quite high, huh? Let's see together why this story deserves such a high rating.
What did I like?
Everything! The story doesn't take itself seriously, it's not an epic crossover of Dragons swooping down on the elemental countries from a forgotten past and last descendants of ancient heroes rising up to the challenge (although that sounds cool). Descriptive parts are slim, dialogue is simple and immediate, there's no thinking parts, but point is it doesn't need all that stuff. This story finds its strength in humor, the writing is good and fits the objective: make Naruto a Dragonborn and make people laugh for it. It does so also through my favorite aspect of the story which is the oh so perfect in-character writing.
The story pans out from Wave's Battle on the Bridge -Enkidu, stay!- where the duel between Kakashi and Zabuza gets interrupted when a Dragon attacks. Cue Zabuza cursing and stuff. The real fun comes later when Naruto and Team 7 get directed to an old cave of legend by Tazuna who, alcohol and all, gets the role of knowledge-dispensing-sage. The scene is the funny, with Naruto getting a new power and not being able to control it, and remaining in character all the time! I had a hard time looking for any discrepancies from his canon twelve years old self, and in the end I found none! Great job, Huoyingmi!
What could be better?
Honestly? I found the first chapter perfect, barring maybe the slightly out of place scene with Haku. Seriousness among fun is hard to place correctly. I guess that the fault I found in the story is that the second chapter is not as good as the first one. That's the reason I couldn’t give it a full 10. Syndrome of Bad Sequel.
My tips to the author
I - You did something good, keep doing it. Try not to put drama or seriousness into this, this story is strong in the funnies.
II - I think that the reason why the second chapter wasn’t as good as the first was the missed occasions for humor, you rushed it. Think things through more and deliver. I mean, you set Kakashi up to sing to Sarutobi the Song of the Dragonborn and you just passed it as 'Kakashi sings the song for him'? That was pure gold just waiting to be mined!
We're at a close, here. I encourage you to read and review the story, support the author and help him keep this same level of writing. This is a small, funny fic that deserves attention and success, and I hope Huoyingmi is up to the challenge.
Meinos Kaen out!